10 Things Every Woman Should Know

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Hi there ladies! I want to share these ten truths that I have learned; most through personal experience and some from observing other women learn these lessons.

LESSON 1 – Take Control Of Your Own Life

When you allow people to dictate to you how you should walk, talk, use your time, resources and emotional energy your really are becoming a doormat and have let people overstep their boundaries. Eventually you become frustrated and unhappy. It is YOUR life, and you CHOOSE how you are going to respond to situations and people.

LESSON 2- Your Opinion Counts

Never allow another person’s opinion be the thing which makes or breaks you- if you notice a pattern where your self-esteem and worth lie on what someone says or doesn’t say, then you need to break that habit fast! As long as who you are is not detrimental to yours or anyone elses’ health, then it is ok to be you! If you suddenly wear black shoes because your friend said that you red shoes are not in this summer, but you like your red shoes then get them out and wear them again. Listen to me girlfriend, you will literally become sick trying to please everybody because people keep changing their minds about what keeps them happy.

LESSON 3- It’s Your Happiness

Take charge of your own happiness. Misery breeds misery and miserable people do not like being in the company of happy people. The world does not owe you a thing, by the way. Quit blaming people, walking with a chip on your shoulder and just get on with life. I know that mean people have done nasty things to you but you have to decide that you will be happy for your own sake.

LESSON 4 – Walk Away

I’m talking about walking away from abusive relationships, unfruitful friendships, or anything that steals your joy, peace and sanity! Your physical, spiritual and emotional health depend on this.

LESSON 5 – Your World

If your outer world is in turmoil, then honey, you have to check what is going on inside. Take a weekend and ask yourself the following questions:

– Do I base my happiness on internal/external factors?

-Am I really doing what I know will make me happy?

– Am I holding onto my past?

– Can I improve my attitude?

Be honest with yourself because this is introspection and it helps.

LESSON 6- The Only Constant Love

It is not found in your boyfriend, your fame or the recognition you get for being so awesome (lol). My dear friend, when others label you He sees a diamond that needs to be polished. When you are rejected, abandoned, used, and mocked… the only person who will still love you even at your worst is GOD. Choose to build a relationship with Him, this is what Christ desires for you. You can disagree with me – sooner or later you will be on the floor seeking His direction. If you are searching for answers.. keep looking because He will reveal Himself to you. One thing I have learned through trial and error is that God was always the only constant source of love. And remember that your own mother can forsake you, but not God. Quit putting your trust in fleeting things, but put your trust in a merciful, loving God who wants to put the pieces together.

LESSON 7 – Value

Value yourself and others will. De-value your worth and the rest will not see it. The truth is, so many people are worried over their own lives that they really will not want to remind you of your worth. It is rare to have people who will encourage you because they may envy you. Do not wait for Mr. Right or Miss She’s So Cool to remind you of the precious woman you are. Start looking at yourself with a whole new perspective and learn to love yourself dearly.

LESSON 8 – Relationships

Please do not drop the things you love doing or fit him into your schedule even when he turns up an hour late. Be honest ladies, if you know you are giving more than you are receiving it is not right. You know why? A man who truly loves his woman would never be selfish in terms of what he gives- with his time and affection and many other things. A man who is in love is giving. If you make him a 4 course meal but he won’t buy you dinner, if he you find yourself thinking about him too much – then you need to get yourself a hobby and relax! Be balanced, stand your ground and do not revolve your life around him. Men respect women who are independent and have a life of their own. Remember that if he does not appreciate you, it is HIS fault, and as Dr. Phil always say, “HE LOST THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO HIM”.

LESSON 9 – Your Health

Please exercise, change your diet, stop the bingeing and totally fall in love with your body. Go shopping and choose clothes that flatter your body, speak good words over it, paint your toenails in pretty bright colours, wear lipgloss, keep your smile white and pearly, for goodness’ sake, love the body you’re in!

LESSON 10 – Believe

Believe in yourself. Believe in yourself. Believe in yourself. Have faith that things will work out for good. Dream big and believe in your ideas. Write down your goals and set out to achieve them. Start looking at life differently. Re-new your mind with faith-filled words. Fight for a better you. Fight for a better life.

                                                                                 IT ALL BEGINS WITH YOU!


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The state of your mental health will determine whether or not you will become successful, as your thoughts determine your actions, which determine your future.

Sure we suffer a few dark days caused by depression and sometimes loneliness but thank God that He has promised good plans for those who seek Him. He has also given us the ability to make ourselves feel good.

“I just wanna feel good everyday. I wanna wear a smile upon my face… Coz feeling good is a choice that we all make… I wanna feel the newness of a brand new day. Happy to be alive today… Singing LA LA LA LA LA”. Lira, Feel Good.

Songbird Lira stressed that point well in her song, “Feel Good”. I tried this ‘experiment’ for a few days. I consciously made an effort to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. Trust me, I know it is difficult, especially if so many things in your life are uncertain. Eventually, like magic, my moods were generally better, I was more friendly and creative. I began to see optimism in so many ‘bad’ situations. You know what,  in the Bible Paul instructs us to meditate on “pure, wholesome, good” thoughts, in other words, “POSITIVE THOUGHTS”. Did you know that you can literally re-program your mind to think positive even in the midst of adversity. It is easier said than done but if you constantly harp on all the negative aspects of your life you will be one miserable chap! I don’t know about you but I have made up my mid to just be happy. It takes time and practise but the results are phenomenal. Of course you will not be cheerful 365 days a year but most of the year your well being will improve. Remember the scripture which reads, “As a man thinketh, so is he”. This should give you the revelation that your mind will act out all that you allow it to contain.

I want you to do this for me. Go and write down 5 things that are positive about yourself and each day for 5 days use those gifts to bless somebody. Do it purposely and then send me a reply, telling me how good it made you feel. I would love to hear from you and see if I have helped you in any way. I will leave you with this thought. ARE YOU SOWING POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE SEEDS IN YOUR MIND?

Be blessed ladies.

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Make Peace With Your Thighs

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I once tuned into Joyce Meyer’s “Enjoying Everyday Life” program and heard her say, “I make peace with my thighs”. What a startling confession! Two-thirds of the crowd, women, wailed in excitement. I am not sure if they were cheering on because someone shared their plight  or if they had come to the same conclusion.

Let thou see the light: if God could write you a letter, based on scripture, I am sure it would read as:

Dear Daughter,

When I created you, I made something that no scientist can emulate. In my image and likeness you were fashoined, and when I saw you, I proclaimed, “Oh my gosh, I ‘m so hectic!”. I intricately wove you when you were in your mom’s womb and placed your nose, freckles, lips and determined the size of your height to My specifications because I saw it as good. In fact, I am enthralled by your beauty. I did not only create your physical appearnace but I placed so much on the inside of you that when you let it shine, you will bless your generation. Do not let your light be dimmed but let it shine. Even if you have allowed your weight slip, I want you to accept yourself as you are and focus on nurturing your body. That way you will adopt a healthy lifestlye and exercise. It depends on how much you respect yourself. Have a good attitude and the outward results will be amazing.

Love Dad.

Ask any psychologist or fitness expert and they will tell you that you first need to love your body and then decide on the goals you want to reach when losing weight. This has both long-term physical and psychological benefits.

I recommend you exercise, drink plenty of water, change your diet if you are eating food that is expanding your waist line and just do it for YOURSELF. Say these words with me, ” I make peace with my thighs and I vow to take care of my body for the sake of peace, serenity and my duty towards God”. Have a Kit- Kat. LOL. Be blessed ladies!

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Every year thousands of people who are dissatisfied with the quality of their lives, want to change and I believe that change is an inevitable process which we all have to undergo one way or the other. Change occurs when we finish school, change jobs, move from an apartment building to a double-storey house… the list is endless. The truth is, when change does occur, the individual who is experiencing that change will have to learn how to adapt. In most cases, sadly, many people adapt to change in a negative way instead of seeing the opportunities change brings. Often times I have heard women complain and tell me that the change they experience is mostly negative.  At this season of my life, I am experiencing change in many areas of my life, some of which I wish I could avoid. At first some of these changes actually depressed me but after looking at each situation optimistically I then challenged myself to change my mindset so that I could create more opportunities and make use of my change in a positive way. I will therefore share some observations I have made once I reached that decision and took action.

1. Your mindset determines the outcome

Here is the truth honey, whether you win P1 million or lose P2000, the end result will be determined on your mindset. If you are financially immature you could possibly squander the winnings and in the case of the lost money, you could actually cry for weeks on end instead of figuring out how to make back the money. I can move into a plush neighbourhood in Sandton, but as long as my mindset is filled with negativity, complaining and bitterness, I will find every opportunity to find something wrong with living in Sandton! My point is, when you experience change, which you will, begin to have an optimistic mindset. Yes, I do know that some situations can get you feeling so low and depressed, but one day you have to pull yourself out of it and encourage yourself along the way because the longer you deal with a situation immaturely, the worse it becomes.

2. Make a realistic plan

I got to a point in my personal life where I had to sit down, literally counsel myself and write down what it is I wanted in my future. After doing so, I then wrote out a detailed plan on how I was most likely to achieve those goals. For example, in terms of my physical health, I wanted to have a healthy, sexy, toned body. I then began to search health magazines for exercise programs, a healthy eating plan, and I had to be honest with myself and cut down on the unhealthy habits. At first I was amazed about the result this produced, but after a while I backslid. Eventually, after gaining back the weight in excess and slipping back into unhealthy habits I found the courage to begin again. This time, I took small, realistic steps and looked at the bigger picture. The truth is, I needed to exercise so that I could maintain a healthy lifestyle. What really mattered was that I respected my body enough to treat it well and not about the compliments I would receive. Now I am easier and more patient with myself and I feel that I can achieve a lot more today. Therefore, my dear lady, when you make a plan, focus on how you will be happy, glorifying God and not on impressing people. The longevity of your plan will be determined by your motive and if it is not to empower yourself then it is not worth it.

3. Enjoy the ride

Quite often we are in such a hurry to see results that when we have not arrived there we become angry and then we lose the plot altogether. I recently became so impatient with myself that I called a good friend of mine and after crying buckets and complaining he looked at me, smiled, and reminded me of all the good I was doing . I then began to change my perspective. You see woman, anything worth changing will take a while. I believe it is because during that process, God wants to really toughen you up; He wants to create patience, perseverance and a glorious character in you. You have to go through the fire you cannot avoid it. There will be times when you feel uncomfortable, yes, but that’s for the testing of your faith. And so stop being so hard on yourself; enjoy the ride. Be thankful that even though you are not where you are, at least it is not where you used to be. You will then wake up one day and say, “Wow, I don’t do that anymore!” And while you are losing weight, please have an ice-cream!

Have a blessed day, may the Lord who is so good make your dreams come true.

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I woke up early this morning and took my daily jog with mum, and then I switched on my laptop to start my real workout – TAEBO.

You need a lot of energy for this workout but even if you do not have it you can build up the stamina. If you are a beginner or you have never even tried it before, no worries – we all start somewhere! Taebo was developed by 7 time World Martial Arts Champion, Billy Banks. Taebo is a blend of self-defense, dance and boxing; combined with great music, it makes for a fabulous workout! Taebo is an effective weight loss and toning workout that will leave your body feeling energised, tight and toned.

Though I pretty much do the workout by myself I feel that I am part of the studio, not just an interactive spectator. Billy Banks has got loads of energy and his workouts are always challenging. Sometimes your kicks will be high on some days, on others..well..not so high. It all depends on your mood and effort. If you give your best you will achieve your best. It is crucial to have a waterbottle handy, because you will sweat a lot and feel dehydrated during the workout. Your body will therefore need a lot of fluid.

Taebo is one of my favourite workouts and I would recommend it to anybody whose goal is to become fit. Of course my aim is not to be as buff as most of the women in the videos, but to just have a strong, healthy body that looks good in shorts and skinny jeans! If you cannot find the Billy Banks Taebo DVD at your video store, then download the 5-part workout at Youtube. Just type in ‘teabo – billy banks’. Take care and remember to put your health first because when your body feels good then so do you. AND DRINK AT LEAST 8 GLASSES OF WATER A DAY- ASK ANYONE WHO HAS GOOD SKIN!

Different groups of exercise

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Since we will be focusing on health this week, I thought it best to start right at the beginning before we move into detail. I will also provide useful links for you to check up in your spare time! Remember lady that at some point in your life you ARE going to gain weight; either because of lousy eating habits, childbirth, thyroid problems or the slowing down of your metabolism. In this article, you will learn about the three major types of exercise.


This type of exercise is performed to enhance the movements of muscles and joints. The most common ways of flexibility are stretching and bending and should be performed before and after the exercise schedule. So please do not just jump onto the street straight after putting on your tights and trainers. If you do not stretch do you know what will happen? YOU ARE MOST LIKELY TO SUFFER AN  INJURY you do not want to go through that.  Stretching also helps any joint pain you may be experiencing and stiff backs. I have found in the past when I was a keen jogger, that my performance improved when I stretched before and after my jog.


Cardiovascular exercise strengthens the muscles and promotes the cardiovascular endurance (by targeting a specific heart rate). The aim of aerobic exercise is to improve the oxygen intake by the body cells. From a moderate to an intense level exercise, aerobic exercise can involve swimming, jogging dancing and other sports.  should aim to do at least 20 minutes a day, or 40 minutes 4 times a week. This form is the best type if you want to lose weight.


AKA weight-lifting – this of course is used to build muscle and to tone up loose fat. In anaerobic exercise, activities such as functional training, weight training and sprints are usually performed. Squats, push-ups, sit-ups, rowing and so on are some of the common types. This can also be a substitute of aerobic exercise.

Don’t want to exercise? think twice

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Late night binges, smoking, inactivity, junk food, facebooking! How much time are you dedicating to your precious body?

I know the weather has been pretty bad in Gaborone, but the rain has stopped now. Time to get your trainers and your tights out girl. If looking sexy in a pair of skinny jeans won’t convince you to hit the road/gym, maybe the following FACTS will!

BENEFIT 1 – Increased energy

When you combine exercise and healthy nutrition your body will be at optimum performance. Your energy levels increase as you have fat loss and increased muscle strength.

BENEFIT 2Self-Esteem boosted

Which girl doesn’t want to look good, feel sexy and fit into a tiny bikini? Let’s be honest ladies – a good ol’ compliment never killed anybody! Besides looking better, when you set yourself goals and you achieve them, you will automatically program your brain into thinking that you can achieve more. When you look and feel better, this empowers you to perform well in other areas of your life.

BENEFIT 3 – Mental Benefits

Did you know that the reason they pushed you to take Physical Training at primary and highschool is because it has been scientifically proven that an active child has the ability to concentrate for longer periods of time, has more confidence and is less likely to fall into sever depression as he/she has a clearer mind. I know that during trying times we are tempted to reach for lasagne and a bottle of dry red wine (lol). But that will only increase the calories and make you more depressed. Exercise releases endorphines which are feel good mechanisms.

BENEFIT 4 – Decreased Risk of a Heart Attack

Making positive changes in your diet, including NO BINGEING, NO SMOKING, and eating healthily decreases your cholesterol and blood pressure levels. Regular walking keeps the heart rate up and in fine condition. You are therefore 60% less likely to suffer a heartstroke. Believe me, a heart attack is not cool!

Benefit 5 – Alleviates Menstrual Pains

Eish, anyone who has ever suffered period pains knows what hell must feel like. It is true though, that you will find a substantial decrease in abdominal pain during your period.

So, those are the top 5 reasons I chose to talk about the benefits of exercise! I also have a bit of adjusting to do (to be fair) but we can all do anything we set our minds to, right? Come on, do yourself a favour and get going girl. All it takes is brisk 30 minute walks 5 times a week and an eating plan, to begin with.